I hear the hum of the refridgerator, the fan in the laundry room, the blast of the heater, and my clicking of the keys beneath my fingertips.  I can even hear my own breathing.  It's calm.  It's peaceful.  It's kind of eerie. 

I yearn for this peace and quiet practically everyday so that I can gather my thoughts and my wits, but yet I miss the chaos of it all.  Wait, did I just say that?!  I suppose I should clarify "chaos."  I want to hear the laughter, the giggles, the singing, the growls of the life in this home.  And yet at the same time, I want to dive into my heart, my soul, and my mind to get a better idea of who God wants me to be. 

I often put my family's needs above my spiritual needs.  But of late, I have discovered that putting their needs in front of my time with God, it's the equivalent of me diving head first into an empty pool with the result of a huge mess that no one should have to clean up.  God doesn't want me to dive into that empty pool.  He wants me to dive into his Word, his loving arms, his everything.  He wants me to take my relationship with him a little bit further.  My eyes are swelling with tears as I realize just how much I need him.  He doesn't NEED me, he WANTS me.  He wants me to put my toes over the edge and dive into a real relationship with hi

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Comments

Found you via Lisa-Jo & Five-Minute-Friday.

What beautiful, tender, & truthful words of wisdom. And so very timely, as I embark on a new season of quietness, diving deeply into the life-giving waters of my Savior.

Thanks so much.

Reply
01/11/2013 3:14am

Hi Kate
I know that your heavenly Pappa must wants you to be Kate!
Good for you for realizing that to love our dear ones, we need to spend time in the Presence of love Personified!
Hugs XX
Mia

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