Thank you for going on this little journey with me.  I never thought I would write about my hurt for all to see, but I wanted to be open, honest, and real with myself.  I didn't want to squash everything down and never talk about it.  This is for me to just get it out there in the open so that I can recognize and face the issues.

I have a wonderful, awesome, amazing husband!  He has been playing a HUGE part in my healing process.  His prayers, his guidance, his ability to let me be upset have all been such a blessing.  He is encouraging me to have get my anger out, vent my frustrations, but to also bring them to God for complete healing.  He has hope for a renewed relationship; a renewed family. 

I am mad at my parents for hurting me.  I am mad at them for all their hate and unforgiveness.  I am mad that they are choosing to be separated from me and my family.  It hurts.  That's about as plain as I can say it.  It. Hurts.

Yet, I long to renew this relationship.  The harboring of anger, the harboring of unforgiveness ends with me.  I will not conform to the generational issues that have come before me.  I do not want to pass any of this on to my own kids.  I, with the help of my husband and my God, will learn to truly forgive and not harbor bitterness.

I love my parents and that is the truth.  I won't and can't stop loving them.  I miss them.  I just pray that we all can forgive one another and grow from this experience.  God has set me free and I'm glad he is walking me through this process.

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