This week I'm so excited to go through Make Over. Having a relationship with God should be our first priority, but the next relationship is that with our spouse. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure, like me, you're madly in love with your spouse. So we get to discuss the Shulamite Woman. Who's that? She's the beauty from the Song of Solomon. <Smile> The relationship with our God and our spouse should be the 2 most amazing relationships in our lives? Why? Because our God knows EVERYTHING about us; the Good, the Bad, the Ugly. And our husbands; should be the same. Now I say "should" as I don't know where a lot of you are with your spouse in this moment, but I want you to think about why you became husband and wife. Take those thoughts with you as you go through this week's readings. If you're single, think about past relationships or those of the future.
Now before we begin, this week's lessons are very intimate questions. I will post a question and answer as honestly as I can without revealing too much of what goes behind closed doors with my man. I do have a side business, Pure Romance by Kate Headley and I'm very comfortable discussing intimacy, so if you have questions, please feel free to privately message me at PRByKateHeadley@gmail.com.
So with that, let's go!
Question 1: Affection is defined as "a tender feeling toward another; fondness." On a scale from 1 to 10, how would you rank the affection level in your marriage? Does one partner get a higher score? Why did you answer as you did?
In my house, I'd say we vary anywhere from the 7-10 scale. It typically varies on the lower range when things get so out of control, we just kind of "miss" each other. However, the higher range on the scale is when we have taken the commitment we have made to one another for intimacy and enforce it. Enforce sounds a little strong, but with everything we do, there is some sort of intentionality.
"Discover that God is radically pro-sex, thrilled about heat between a man and his wife, even happier about their affection."
1 This is Solomon’s song of songs, more wonderful than any
2 Kiss me and kiss me again, for your love is sweeter than wine.
3 How fragrant your cologne; your name is like its spreading fragrance. No wonder all the young women love you!
4 Take me with you; come, let’s run! The king has brought me into his bedroom.
Young Women of Jerusalem
How happy we are for you, O king. We praise your love even more than wine.
How right they are to adore you.
Question 2: What favorite elements of romance do you see here?
I see the blooming of love affair. She loves his kisses, his smell. He was so desired not only by her, but by all women and she knew he was hers; so did the other women.
Do you remember when you met your significant other? I do. The desire to be with him was so intense.
Question 3: List the top five qualities you loved about your husband when you first fell in love.
1. Kind 2. Gentle 3. His lips 4. His caring nature 5. The way he made me feel like I was the only woman in the world.
Question 4: If affection for your husband has given way to function, can you look deep and see where you are responsible? What have you allowed? How have you contributed? Did you come into marriage with any inflated expectations? If so, what were they?
It takes two to tango as they say. We can't put all the blame into our relationship onto our spouse. We have to admit that we share in some of the "blah." So as Jen says, "Remember that intoxicating affection you felt....Repent....Do the things you did at first."
Depending on where you are in your relationship, some of these things may be hard for you because you've been hurt. Marriage is hard work. So choose your spouse. "Stand with Jesus and face your marriage together." Let Him be the center of it all. Let Him work in the both of you.
Thanks for being here today,